I miss you. How have you been? I'm okay.
Well, not okay, more like trying to catch my breath.
Last year I had no idea that this would happen. I intended to be a vegetable raising, novel writing, piano playing, fun things crafting, blogging sort of girl for the rest of my life - or till I got married - whichever came first. But then, life went crazy, and nothing is what I had planned. I'm a totally different person, it's like I've been morphed into some other human being. I'm still trying to figure out where that person came from.
I catch glimpses of myself in the rear view mirror of my car, and struggle to realize that that person in the driver's seat is me. Me... the girl who was never, ever going to learn to drive. That person with the zebra striped phone to her ear, the earrings, the new haircut, the business suit. That's me?
I'm the girl rushing around her apartment kitchen, grabbing coffee, petting the cats, heels clicking, adrenaline racing, all to get to work on time.
I'm the girl typing up documents in a lawyer's office, answering phones (who'da thought... all my life I have hated phones!) chatting with clients, and puzzling over the intricacies of the law.
I'm the girl planning her first foray into college.
Can you see why I'm going crazy? Why I sometimes catch myself and wonder what the name of this new person is, and where on earth I disappeared to. I love all this new life, but a part of me still reaches back to the quiet country girl who had nothing more exciting to talk about than the deer who ate my beet plants. I miss that girl sometimes.
Maybe she hasn't completely disappeared. I catch glimpses of her occasionally. She's the one who loves to cook, who pins furiously in an attempt to satisfy her inner crafter. The girl who gets up in the middle of the night to jot down a plot for a novel. I still have a garden, even though it's shrunk considerably, (for instance: from 40 tomato plants, to 2). I still play the piano, though nowadays, I only have time for one song, played after I get home from work in an attempt to calm down from the bustle. I still read, even if only in snippets. And I still want to blog. At work, I have blog posts forever flitting into my head. (Not a good thing if you are trying to write a business letter to a client.)
So there you are my dear blogosphere. There is me all wrapped up in a confusing tangle, something like the gordian knot you know.
I hope this letter finds you well. Do tell me what is going on with you.
Sincerely yours,
Amanda
:)
Fine print: If you've read this far, the images are not mine, totally adorable though. :)
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